I feel forced
to obey you.
And I think
to myself
“Aren’t
disappointments in life enough?”
She thinks. She
stutters. She whispers.
She carried an
ounce of him for a few weeks
in her womb
and she could not even bring herself
to tell him.
She was left
to figure it out all on her own.
You’re
callous. You’re kind. You’re all encompassing.
Who am I to
question your paradigms
when my own
deeds define my own past.
I cannot be
left alone
and yet I
cannot walk among the righteous.
They’ve
drawn the line. They all stand on one end.
On the
other, it is I.
To what end
shall I consider my fate stand crumbling?
She deceived
herself. She felt loved.
Then she
stumbled across the only truth worth knowing.
I’ve felt
it. I’ve touched it. I’ve tasted it.
Yet I’m
confused.
Would you
just let me go on and let it be
the way it
all is?
Or would it
all end one day
and I’ll
start another life to see yet another era?
Could you
just… would you just…
Hold me alone.
Hold me close. Hold me still.
I’ve been
too happy and I’m afraid,
I may run
into a wall.
15th January 2013
